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What Do You Think This Poems About ?

I wrote it but I don’t think anyone else can interpret it soo…tell me what you think and guys its not edit sooo easy up lol
It feels like pain smell like rain
It reminds you of old time, struggles, hard ache like when people had a meaning to fight
When love meant love and not sex
And being love was not when you just meet
Like having that one cool breeze after a hot day
Like Fridays when you just got paid
If feels like being Under a sun with no heat, a hip hop song with no beat
Might be poetry
A lot of good loving in-between the lines
Like when he tells you he loves you for the first time
How you told me how wonderful I was after you read between my thighs
Like how sweet it taste and how bitter the prize
Did you like what you did not find
How my love reminds you of your favorite lyricist like common, erykah and floetry
Listen hard and it might be poetry
When the worlds slows down , and the cars get faster
And the same old tired ***** in every movie and video like cast her
That only increase my laughter,
See it not the speed of the car, or the internet its what comes after
Like when the lights shut off, not TV to entertain us , no lil boosite, young jock or other nursery rhyme rappers to make us mad
And a pen and paper is all you’ll have
The room is so hazy with the lights down low, the pen dries people line up like in a military row
I keep reminding them this anit no show
Then my eyes tiptoe, to a boy in the corner with black hoody with his eyes so low said it to us so……..
Turn off the cell phones, pods, blackberry’s, and two ways
Because its 2008 ,believe me it getting late
Children are dying at the age of eight
Not even the church is safe
Preachers preaching about money
Accounts preaching about god
Not hitchhikers but mothers asking for rides
The boy get on stage and tells me to step to the side
He lends in closer in says into the mic
Has it ever rained so hard after it didn’t for so long,
and you turn off the TV. And lay in the dark just to listen to natures song
And you never felt so alone
If you listen a little closer you might hear the lines and rhythm of rain
Like the trees being a old church women that’s can sing , leaves fall so dramatically like someone catching the holy ghost and they just cant stay in their seat.
The message is not poetry but it might be me

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Posted in Comments & Questions.

14 comments

14 Replies

  1. Someone looking back on how life and the world has changed and wishing they were back in a time of innocence.

  2. salinger Feb 27th 2010

    I would say its about someone missing out on the best/true things in life and filling that void with technology.

  3. Derek G Feb 27th 2010

    longing for the way things were……unfortunately nothing stays the same.

  4. i would say an old person reminiscing or about someones life who has died.

  5. trkmonke Feb 28th 2010

    Dont know what its about but I like it…

  6. You can write good Kim but you need English lessons to perfect your art. I’m sorry if I offend you but please consider what I say. The poem is deep and interesting but its more of a rap song and not good literature. What do you want? To write songs or poetry? You have to choose. If you choose poetry then you must study a little to perfect what you are writing just like the rest of us have to study to perfect our careers.

  7. MarkJen Feb 28th 2010

    Well, it is kind of long for my liking. But you did put a lot of thought into it it seems like!

  8. magoojes Feb 28th 2010

    Must say i do enjoy works of literature but you need a good editor because this doesn’t hold anything from the first line,sorry. Keep going though as long as you enjoy it that’s what writing is about.

  9. kurvanti Feb 28th 2010

    sounds like it may be about the condition of the planet and life on it

  10. The one and only TOM TIT Mar 1st 2010

    shitt

  11. t.andrew Mar 1st 2010

    Sweetheart it is to long and rambling but apart from that it is from your heart, good luck.

  12. miss (chocolate) starfish Mar 1st 2010

    about your breasts!!! PUT THEM AWAY so we can concentrate on the poem !

  13. trickytr Mar 1st 2010

    I think its about losing your virginity

  14. ** rÂW® ** life has escaped Mar 1st 2010

    Love, unlike how it is now and how it used to be when people really loved each other more than words can say


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